Why don't I feel alive in a relationship?

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I’m reminded of a stanza in a song:

Hello, my old heart
It's been so long
Since I've given you away
And every day, I add another stone
To the walls I built around you
To keep you safe

Keeping your heart safe, protecting it from harm, keeps you from really investing and growing and feeling and being alive in a relationship.

The only way to keep your heart alive is to give it away.