I’m one of those people who get stereotyped before people even know me, as soon as they meet me in fact? How can I counteract this?

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Well, if you care about superficial responses from people, than an easy way to change those superficial responses is to change your surface. Sometimes something as simple as a different haircut can totally change how others relate to you.

When I was a wee lad I got hit on by a lot of gay guys, even though I wasn’t gay. More than one guy stopped their car while I was walking to try to talk to me. It annoyed me enough to want to try to change it. I eventually picked out enough “gay mannerisms” that I’d managed to acquire and change them, so that it didn’t happen anymore.

To do this you need to be able to see yourself as other people see you. You may need to devote some time to understanding the cultural zeitgeist of the people around you. It should not be hard to change the surface of your behaviors. In fact, you should be able to change the surface of your behavior such that you’re getting completely positive reactions.

Own your audience, don’t let your audience own you.