Why does a man needs time to sort his feelings out?

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It means he’s not ready to Get Serious. You can help him sort out his feelings by asking about them. You don’t have to Get Serious all at once, you can negotiate a path forward that meets your need to see progress towards your goals, and his need for flexibility and space to still be himself.

Relationships don’t die overnight, breakups usually happen either because the relationship was never serious in the first place, or after a long series of events that eroded trust to the point where both people are just going through the motions. So think about your relationship and try to gauge to see if it’s really dying or not.

Couples rarely feel the same way about each other at the same time, usually one person wants commitment or sex or to move in together or whatever before the other person does, and so has to convince and negotiate a path towards it. It’s helpful to understand that this doesn’t ever really go away, there is always going to be some part of that other person that you might want that they might want to keep to themselves.

I wanted to spend more time with my girlfriend and when she started spending more time with me, I started wanting more quality time. Then I wanted to spend the time at her place. On and on. If I got caught up in one particular desire and hammered on it all the time, rather than just relaxed and enjoyed it for what it was, we’d have broken up a long time ago out of frustration.

Instead I’m relaxed and happy about my relationship. Not 100% happy of course, but who is?