Why do I always like men who seem sad or distant?

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I think a lot of attraction comes ultimately from our childhood. We have experiences that, for whatever reason, made a really deep impression on us. We try to live out those experiences all the way through adulthood.

I think through practices like meditation and self-inquiry we can come to grips with these old patterns. Just lay back, maybe in a hot bath or something, and think aimlessly about what you’re attracted to and why, and just let the thoughts free-associate.

Accept whatever thoughts come your way and try to build on them. For example, if you have a random thought about cherry trees, don’t just dismiss it as idle daydreaming. Assume that it means something and chase it down like a detective.

Eventually you’ll get good at this sort of thing and you’ll be able to plumb depths of meaning in yourself you never would have thought possible.

If you see me looking sad or that I have something on my mind, that’s probably what I’m doing. See what I did there? I love it when stuff comes full circle.