Why is it so rare for men to pursue a woman like they used to? They all seem to blah and passive about courting women and planning dates. Why?

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I personally find dating an absolute slog. You ask them out and they don’t give you a straight no. Instead they tell you yes and then when it comes time to put something together all of a sudden it’s like they’re busier than a beehive.

Then you finally get someone to go out with you and making conversation is like pulling teeth. You get one-word answers to everything and they have no interest in anything remotely interesting. The ladies don’t put the slightest effort into it.

I eventually gave up and redoubled my efforts back onto my female friends. One of them is finally on the cusp of becoming my girlfriend, after perhaps three years of knowing each other, over a year of dating.

Dating strikes me as a highly cultural activity. Once the traditions of dating die out, they don’t come back. If you want the old ways, you have to restrict your efforts to those who want the old ways too just like you do. The world’s moved on and you have to adapt.

In my case, I decided that lack of variety in my dating pool was worth putting up with for the lack of frustration in getting over the hump where you don’t quite know someone well enough to trust them yet, even enough to give them simple, straight, reliable answers about stuff.

I can easily see how both guys and girls can get just incredibly blasé about dating. And all the good people you’d want to date just aren’t dating because they gave up.