Can a girl have platonic guy friends?

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What does ‘platonic’ really mean anyway?

Does it mean they’re not attracted to you? Then no, it’s going to be difficult for any pretty young lady to have guy friends that aren’t attracted to them. Unless you have some weird thing about you like gigantic feet or whatever that just totally turns somebody off, and even then, it’s not going to turn off everyone.

A person’s interest scales smoothly from friendly, to romantic, to sexual. Most of the time, my interest in a pretty female is squarely between friendly and romantic. I do not want to be romantic with someone that I am not friendly with, and generally I do not go seeking out new friends. So new ladies coming into my life are generally there because I’m interested in romance. If the romance doesn’t work, then I’ll pull off and allow a great friendship to develop.

A lot of guys are like me. A lot of guys also tend to be squarely between romantic and sexual. This is the sort of mindset that the people saying “you can’t have platonic guy friends” are coming from. If a female doesn’t reciprocate their interest, they get rid of them because, in my opinion, they don’t really respect females as anything other than sex objects.

My old roommate is like this. We have a mutual friend in common that is absolutely gorgeous, but has a boyfriend. He tried to hook up with her but she wasn’t having it. When I met her, she was unattached but I was turned off by her smoking. She eventually gave it up for vaping but by that time she had a boyfriend. For me, no problem, I don’t need anything more from her than friendship. For him, he just doesn’t understand how I can do it.

Our friendship is not entirely platonic, once she gave up smoking my attraction towards her returned. We flirt, hug, touch, listen to her boyfriend, who is a musician, play music together. As we spend more time together, we get to know each other more. It’s very possible if she ever broke up with him, we’d jump in bed with each other just to get it out of our systems. Or maybe not, I’ve had female friends that weren’t quite platonic that it didn’t go that way after they broke up with their boyfriends.

This sort of thing drives my roommate crazy. He’d get possessive and in general just wouldn’t be able to deal. Me? Just fine with it. I’m fine with an attractive lady doing attractive and lovely things around me. Other guys call this “leading them on.” Stupid, but what can you do?

The girl I’m dating right now started as a friend. As we gradually got to know each other over the course of a few years we developed real feelings for each other. We’re not exclusive so I’m free to date others and she is to see others. It’s not ideal for me, I would prefer a more possessive girl, but she doesn’t want that so I deal.

I wouldn’t let anyone tell you how to live your life. Have whatever kinds of friendship that you want and that your friends also want. But be aware that attraction isn’t a choice. Your guy friends are probably attracted to you. How you deal with that is up to you, but if I were you, I’d tread delicately around the subject when it comes up, assuming you’re don’t share their feelings. Not returning their affections won’t be the end of your friendship, but being mean about it could very well be. You might consider hooking them up with your girl friends just to get their minds off of you.