A lot of people undervalue safety and overvalue what they consider to be personality. In reality the only thing girls really demand of boys is that they not let things get too awkward. If you can fix that your dating life will be more successful.
Also too while you might look at yourself or a lovelorn boy as a kind gentleman, her perspective might be very different. We generally don’t see ourselves as well as other people see us. If you’re not getting the kind of response you want from the ladies you’re interested in, your best bet is to ask for feedback from them and try to develop yourself in the areas they point out.