One of the weirdest lessons I had to learn as an adult was that not all old people earn wisdom with their years. Some hold stubbornly on to mean old ways of life. You can’t always trust the advice they give you and they certainly don’t all have your best interests at heart.
The best thing you can do is to try to be gracious. Sometimes it’s easier and sometimes it’s harder. It’s especially hard once you become an adult and they start turning that meanness on to you.
I don’t think they mean it but the world was a harsh place when they were kids. And everyone grows up differently. My mom’s stepmom was so mean to her the whole neighborhood would pitch in to make my mom’s life easier. My grandma would “hire” her out to do housework for the neighbors and they’d just give her a doll and let her play. Or give her some free time to do her homework, her parents would never let her.
My mom made mistakes with me but they’re nothing compared to the mistakes her parents made with her. But nobody even knew or understood what good parenting was when our grandparents were kids.
As a result nobody really learned how to treat each other. My grandparents on my father’s side learned a little bit of wisdom. But it’s hard to watch them be mean to each other. You can try to talk to them to get them to be nicer, and they’ll agree, but it’ll only last a few days. Old ingrained habits die hard.
Be careful how you treat people. If you let yourself get too set in your ways, you’ll be just like that when you get old too.